2024 Author: Leah Sherlock | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 05:25
It is hardly possible now to find a person who has not read horoscopes. But in our age of science, not everyone trusts astrology, although in many ways it turns out to be accurate. But the funny characterization of the signs of the zodiac may well interest even the most seasoned skeptics. Reading playful horoscopes can pass the time, have fun in the company and even learn the basics of astrology. A light humorous form, aptly emphasizing the main qualities of each sign, quite helps in this interesting matter.
Aries
All the cool characteristics of the signs of the zodiac agree on one thing: you will not be able to find a more stubborn debater than this capricious and die-hard lamb.
Aries hates everyday routine, but he will be happy to spin around and give out his innovative ideas incessantly. It is almost impossible to force him to do what he does not want. But there is one little trick. Tell the other person to do it better. Here Aries will break into a cake to prove his leadership and superiority.
The fiery nature of Aries is marked by funny characteristics of the signs of the zodiac. In terms of the time that this person is willing to spend on conquering the object of his passion, he has no equal. A ram, he is a ram in Africa, going right through the jungle. Aries in this matter can even be called a rocket - it acts instantly, assertively and it is simply unrealistic to get rid of his courtship. “You are attractive, I am damn attractive, so why waste time” is his motto in love.
Taurus
Here it is, a worthy competitor of Aries in terms of stubbornness. This will be confirmed to you not only by ordinary horoscopes, but also by any funny characteristic of the signs of the zodiac. Moreover, to enviable perseverance is attached as a "bonus" and fierce conservatism. Try to get Taurus to throw out something from outdated household trash and you will understand this. Whether it's a damaged disc, a notebook left over from school days, or torn sneakers, it doesn't matter. For him, all these things are valuable. And Taurus is a terrible bore: listening to their endless teachings, you can not only fall asleep, but also snore.
Representatives of this constellation are closed personalities. It's easier to talk to a wall than to a Taurus. At least by tapping on it, you will hear a rumble. In the case of Taurus, the afterlife silence and ringing silence will remain.
To love, the attitude of Taurus is the same as to things - the more money and time he spent seeking you, the more valuable you will be for him. And do not expect originality in courtship - Taurus' conservatism extends to amorous affairs.
Gemini
They are easy in deeds and thoughts. The twins are from that breed of people that will advocate "for any kipish, except for a hunger strike." As noted by the funny characteristics of the signs of the zodiac, by date of birth and character, these personalities fully correspond to eccentric individuals who have a whole company of winds walking in their heads.
Gemini's love of chatter is truly catastrophic for those who are not Gemini themselves. For many hours they can not be silent, completely ignoring the reaction of others. It seems that even at his own commemoration, the Gemini will rise from the coffin and tell the faint-hearted guests an anecdote.
The laziness of these personalities is as legendary as their speaking skills. Because of the unwillingness to delve into some topic and study it for a long time, they superficially describe this or that phenomenon, picking up a little of everything. The ideal profession for them is one that will help you earn a million instantly and without unnecessary gestures. Oh yes, Gemini needs a lot of money, because they spend it as easily and naturally as they chirp on the phone.
Cancer
Natureintelligent, soft and romantic, even if outwardly they look like a stale loaf, a brutal dork or an uncouth hillbilly. When watching non-children's films of an erotic nature, they always secretly hope that the main characters will get married in the end.
A funny characterization of the zodiac signs compares Cancers to their animal namesakes. Like them, representatives of this constellation, if they take a neat step forward, then immediately run back. They are indecisive types who, due to their caution, are afraid to even change - you never know what the other person has in mind.
Sparkling jokes in the presence of Cancer is undesirable, because these people are sentimental and can get upset even because of light humor directed at them or their loved ones. Satire about animals is the strictest taboo. They would rather survive an earthquake and a tsunami than endure dark humor about unfortunate dogs and cats. You should also joke about love affairs more carefully and preferably in a romantic way - then Cancer will tell the story that amused him to everyone for a long time.
Lion
The one and only king of beasts. He is proud and stately, even if he is locked in a zoo cage. The wild cries of nearby animals do not interest him - he is an important person and demonstrates this in every possible way. If we consider the main characteristics of the signs of the zodiac, a funny description highlights the roy alty of this person, which, it seems, no trouble can bring down the arrogance of.
What is good for Leo himself is not very fun and pleasant for his loved ones, because he needs treatment worthy of status. In his opinion, those around him should already be glad that His Highness is nearby. The lion's aura is able to outshine everything around with its radiance, painting even a muddy swamp with all the colors of the rainbow.
However, sometimes in the whirlpool of events that the Leo generates around him, it may not be what he would like to get into. What can you do, such is the power of the royal will. Do you want to recognize a Leo in your surroundings? Listen to the manner of speaking: the use of the pronoun "I" by this type will exceed all possible limits. Not such a bad quality in our age for a person who wants to make a dizzying career, agree?
Virgo
True confirmation that appearances can be deceiving is the representatives of this constellation. It would seem that at the word "virgin" imagination draws us a sweet, fragile and vulnerable creature that sits at home for needlework. Astrologers, who make up the characteristics of the signs of the zodiac, disagree with this view. The funny irony of fate is that in reality things are "a little" different. Instead of a sensitive friend who has supported since hard times, a comrade-in-arms in all endeavors, Virgo can easily turn out to be … a serial killer. Yes, yes, statistics say that most maniacs were born under this zodiac sign (what else can you expect from such neat and clean people?).
Virgo can easily use her ability to adapt to the environment and be always emphatically polite and correct person to achieve the desired goal. You won't even have time to blink an eye, and she is already sitting on the right hand of the director. But the object of his love will never show sympathy until he is convinced of the reciprocity of feelings and prospects. But then, even after being refused, he will patiently wait: what if something changes.
Libra
Whatever the funny characteristics of the signs of the zodiac, over the years and months, they all accurately determine one thing: this sign fully justifies its name. Libra people are constantly in search of spiritual balance, and therefore do not pay attention to the material world at all. Let someone else deal with everyday problems, whether it's cooking, washing or cleaning, and Libra has something more sublime.
People of this sign are always thrown in different directions. Quickly fired up with a new idea, they will throw all available resources into implementing it. They will connect a lot of people and create an event of a national scale, but in the middle of the road they will get bored with all this. They quietly withdraw, leaving others to clean up the mess they made.
The inconstancy of Libra extends to love affairs. Moreover, for them this state is so familiar that after betraying them, evenconscience will not torment. After all, they do not at all attempt to destroy the family, and so, they started an affair. So, worthy of forgiveness.
Scorpio
These are real poisonous infections. Ridiculous descriptions of the signs of the zodiac in poetry and prose sing of their ability to break the hearts of everyone who is within sight. This is due to the natural charm of Scorpios and their ability to seduce. This sign has the ability to constantly fall in love with someone, and each time "to the grave." The object of attention will immediately be put before this fact. It is unlikely that you will be able to get away from the original courtship of Scorpio, and you will not want to - he is a subtle psychologist and will certainly be able to find a path to the heart of his beloved (or lover).
Scorpios are born leaders and smart beyond their years. If a representative of this sign has chosen a goal for himself, then, no matter how difficult it is to achieve, he will go towards it with principled obstinacy. And let it be necessary to destroy everything that gets in the way - this will not stop Scorpio. But he will build a new world after the arranged chaos with the same enthusiasm.
Sagittarius
People of this zodiac sign always achieve their goal, even if it does not happen immediately. A funny characteristic of the signs of the zodiac advises you to look at their symbol: everything will immediately become clear. Only now, if others get what they want thanks to perseverance and hard work, Sagittarius is helped in this by a fair wind, which directs the shot arrows exactly to the bullseye.
By nature, Sagittarians are real benefactors. They are always trying to take pity on everyone and feed the suffering (and it doesn’t matter what the recipients themselves think). Their motto is “who but me?”. This is great for employers. Well, what, Sagittarius will not mind if he is loaded with a bunch of work. It is only necessary to hint that it is very important for the company that everything is done. And how exactly - Sagittarius himself will be able to find a way.
But don't openly offend Sagittarius. No, they are not vindictive at all, just evil, and they have an excellent memory. They will remind you of all the misunderstandings since kindergarten. And, in general, they will easily express the truth in person, risking getting in their own face.
Capricorn
This is a man-pendulum that always balances between two extremes, as the funny characterization of the signs of the zodiac claims. Children of this sign are characterized by adult seriousness and thoroughness. Capricorn does not part with these qualities even in old age. He rushes headlong into work, as if into a whirlpool, and it will be simply unrealistic to pull him out. He will spend all his mental and physical strength even on a deliberately impossible task. However, if Capricorn is impatient to go on a spree, then he will give himself up to this occupation completely, having uncontrollable fun until complete degradation. You can save him from a sad fate only if you manage to divert attention to something more interesting.
Capricorns are incorrigible pessimists. If he is already convinced that all around are creeping reptiles thatthey came to success over their heads or through the bed, then at least a stake on his head will not convince you anyway.
Aquarius
Verbalism spills out of Aquarius like water from a tap. If anyone is able to withstand this flow for a long time and even be an interesting conversationalist, it is Gemini. Perhaps one can still argue who will talk to whom in the end.
Love for Aquarius is first of all romance: walks under the moon, meeting the dawn. Get ready to conquer the ancient ruins shrouded in secrets with him - this is an indispensable attribute of courtship for him. According to the cool characteristics of the signs of the zodiac, such a person has no equal in poetry and serenades. Aquarius women are accustomed to follow the dictates of the heart. If it tells you that you should be together, wait for her on the doorstep with suitcases.
What do Aquarians value the most? Of course, personal space. They are ready to build a three-meter wall around themselves, as long as no one touches them if they want to be alone. And no siege will help - Aquarius has made the necessary supply of cookies and will live for a long time and not grieve in his cozy little world.
Pisces
If anyone is able to create an alternative fictional reality out of nothing for themselves and those around them, it is Pisces. And for them, the world of fantasy will be as real as our usual one. They will easily convince anyone of this. Baron Munchausen, for example, according to the characteristics of the signs of the zodiac, a funny Dreamer Fish, an inexperienced and timid fry, a faded caviar.
Ask this person for anything - water the flowers in your absence, write a diploma for you - he will certainly break into a cake, but he will fulfill the request. Such an altruist was born, nothing can be done. In love, Pisces are shy and cautious, and will beat around the bush for a long time before taking a step towards them. "Vanilla" is about them: sad sighs, touching gifts, embarrassment and tears at night, and, most importantly, all thoughts are only about him (or her). So if you are ready to take a Pisces in love with you and lead it under the elbow in the right direction (and then push it forward with kicks all your life) - go for it.
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